Chapter 14
Song: In the Middle by Theory of a Deadman
I awoke to a loud moan and quickly realized it was my own.
Fire pooled between my legs as I felt talented fingers gliding in and out of me. Without opening my eyes, my mouth found Edward's neck. I licked and kissed every inch of it, side to side, over his Adam's apple, and beneath his chin. The budding scruff along his jaw line scraped my willing tongue and tickled my lips.
“You know, you sleep talk,” he finally spoke in a husky voice as his hand continued its ministration.
“Oh no,” I groaned into the crook of his neck. “I haven't done that in years!”
“No worries, love. It was incredibly sexy to wake up hearing you say my name. Especially with your hand wrapped around my cock.”
I couldn't help it, I burst into a fit of giggles. Even in my sleep, I was trying to have sex with him. I think he understood because he joined my musings, but it didn't last long. Our humorous moment quickly returned to its erotic beginning...which led to a very happy ending for both of us.
After basking in the afterglow for ten or fifteen minutes, I rolled away from Edward's warm arms and out of my bed. I picked up his shirt and boxers from the floor and put them on as he watched me with one eyebrow raised. Granted, we were in my home where I could have put on anything of mine, but I knew this way he would be left with only his pants and I'd get a little extra time to ogle his hot body. I also wanted to be surrounded by his delicious scent.
I skipped off to the bathroom to freshen up and give my teeth a good scrubbing considering that we missed that part last night. While that was normally unacceptable to me, I was too caught up last night to care.
“I left an extra toothbrush on the counter for you,” I said, poking my head into the bedroom. “I'm going to make some breakfast.”
I heard him go into the bathroom as I prepared coffee, pancakes, eggs, toast, bacon and fresh fruit.
“Hungry this morning?” he chuckled as he wrapped his arms around my waist from behind. I was just finishing the last batch of pancakes and flipping them onto a plate. I spun around, spatula and plate in my hands and stretched on my tip toes with puckered lips. He bent down to meet me, and we kissed lightly before taking our seats at the table to eat.
In that moment, my heart broke a little. The realization that Edward and I could never have this kind of life together was painful. Who's to say we would ever be compatible like this, but still, not being able to ever give that a chance struck a chord in me I hadn't realized existed until just then.
I took a fast gulp of my coffee to shield the look on my face I didn't want to reveal. “Ouch! That's really hot!” I lied and winced.
Shoving those useless observations away, I studied Edward's gorgeous body as we ate and made small talk. It was a worthy distraction from my errant thoughts and it kept me from getting off track again.
When we had cleaned up the kitchen, we retreated back to my bedroom where we stacked pillows against the headboard and cuddled up together. He found some car show I would never fully understand and we settled into companionable silence for the duration of the program. When it ended, he turned to look at me.
“Regrettable as it is, I really do have a lot I need to get done today.”
“I know,” I sighed, squeezing him around his ribs. He softly chuckled at my unwillingness to let him go.
“Can I see you tonight?” he asked.
“I kind of have plans already,” I said with a twinge of sadness. It was the truth. Ben was having another one of his parties and I had already promised Jacob I would have dinner with him beforehand.
“Sunday afternoon?”
“Brunch with my parents,” I sighed.
“Well, that's the way things go sometime. Can I still call you later?”
“Of course,” I smiled. “I probably won't be able to answer after seven, but anytime before that is fine.”
“Okay,” he smiled back, stretching his arms over his head and preparing to stand.
I stood with him and fingered the hem of his shirt I was wearing. “I guess you need this back.”
He nodded, and I gave him a little smirk. Facing him, I took a step closer and crisscrossed my arms to peel it off me and over my head. I handed it back to him and stood there topless as he slid it over his head. He grabbed a fist full of the fabric near the collar and pulled it to his nose.
“It smells like you now,” he said softly beaming down at me.
I put my thumbs into the waistband of his boxers to slide them off, but he caught my wrists before I could.
“Keep them,” he whispered in my ear and placed a kiss on the soft skin just below. “They look better on you anyway. You can wear them to bed with one of those little tank tops of yours. Mmm...”
I giggled and slapped his chest playfully, then went to my dresser to retrieve one of said tank tops. I heard him sigh as I covered my body with the thin fabric. We walked slowly to my door, hand in hand and stopped before opening it. Our kiss was full of emotion and appreciation and tasted like coffee and syrup as our tongues danced together.
“Thank you,” he said softly when our kiss broke. “This was wonderful.”
“Likewise,” I agreed with a smile.
He stood there looking into my eyes for many moments, and I had to be the one to break the silence.
“Go!” I pushed away from him. “If you don't I'm going to drag you back inside and keep you in my bed all day long!”
“Tempting...” He took a step closer to me, closing the gap I had created. One of his arms curled around to the small of my back so that I was pressed against him. I could feel his growing arousal, but I wiggled out of his grasp.
“You think I'm joking,” I purred. “You're the one who has stuff to do today.”
“No, I know you're not joking. That's the hard part,” he sighed. “But you're right, I need to get going, as much as I don't want to.”
He kissed me quickly once more, then turned for the door. I stood there watching until his car pulled away and was out of sight on my street.
Back in my room, I collapsed face first into my bed, breathing deeply and taking in Edward's sweet, musky scent on my pillows.
There was no way I was bringing Jacob back here tonight. I wasn't ready to rid my bed of this delicious scent or the memories that went with it.
………………..
After a shower and a quick clean up of the apartment, I decided to head to the laundromat then the gym. I flipped through the latest Cosmo as I waited for my clothes and talked to Rosalie who agreed to meet me for a work out.
We warmed up on the elliptical and headed to the circuit room to make our rounds there.
She had decided to go to Felix's house last night since I didn't come home with her, and she told me all about finding Ben passed out on the couch. Apparently he had one hand in his pants, the other hanging off the side of the sofa, and he was snoring like a bear. We both got a good laugh out of that.
I gave her the recap of my night with most of the details, but I left out the discussion about our situation and our family pasts.
“I forgot how hot he was. I’ve only seen him a couple times, you know?” she smiled wryly at me.
“He is, isn't he? And you haven't even seen him naked!” We laughed and bantered about that a little longer.
“Seriously, though, Bells,” she went on. “You should see the way he looks at you. He's really into you.”
“Really?” I asked hopefully. She nodded at me.
“Yeah, he's got it bad. Then again, you do, too!” she teased.
I felt my cheeks flush and was glad my body was already overheated from the exercise. At least I was already too splotchy and red everywhere else to make the blush obvious. Not that Rose would care.
“I do like him,” I admitted. “I just wish I didn't sometimes. It would make things easier.”
“Yeah,” she trailed off. She looked as though she was reminiscing.
“It's complicated.”
“Believe you me, I know it is. Just don't get hurt, baby girl. That's why I'm glad you're still seeing other people.”
I nodded in agreement, and we continued our workout. We didn't return to the subject of Edward for the rest of the time there.
As much as I love my best friend, I was happy to get back on the treadmill for a run and put on my iPod. Leaving my usual rock and roll bubble while I ran, I went for something mindless and girlie and listened to some Beyoncé. It served its purpose for distraction and I was able to sing along in my head to most of it instead of thinking about Edward the entire time. I won't say my overall workout cleared my head, but it did help.
I liked Edward, but I didn't want to like him too much. It was a delicate balance for both of us, I knew. Our circumstances were clearly impossible, but I didn't want to stop. A couple months ago I may have been able to blow him off and move on to the next guy. Not now. Not when we had really gotten close and become friends. Not when real feelings had developed between us along the way.
I would just have to think of Edward the way I do Jacob and Garrett and any other guy. We would do our thing, have our fun, and even if I felt affectionate toward him, I would put myself first.
I could do that.
It's what I have been doing since James, so no problem. I think.
Rosalie and I went back to her house and got cleaned up, and she suggested some retail therapy to round out the day. I reminded her that we were saving for L.A. and that we would just have to wear something we already owned to Ben's party tonight. She unhappily conceded, and we went about picking out items from her wardrobe and modeling them for one another. As we did, we computed how much money we should put away each week and how long it would take us to save enough. We had to take other things into consideration – me saving to get out of my apartment, allotments for clothes and alcohol, and, oh yeah, bills. We concluded that it would take some time, but we could definitely do it before summer if we stayed faithful to our plan and budget.
We lounged around a little bit longer, and then I headed home to get ready for my dinner with Jacob.
Since there was a party tonight, I chose a pair of black pants and a low cut gray and silver top. I found a matching pair of silver pumps and wore my hair up in a curly, flowy ponytail. When Jacob picked me up, he gave me a little spin by my hand and kissed me in approval.
Dinner was nice. Not particularly anything special, which was fine, but we had a good time talking and catching up since Wednesday. I told him about my plans to go back to L.A. and visit Emmett again, and he asked how my cousin was doing.
By the time we arrived at Ben's, a fairly decent crowd had already gathered. Jacob went straight to the alcohol, and I went in search of Rosalie since I had seen her car in the driveway. I passed Garrett in the hall and he made sure to give me a playful smack on the ass as I went by. I eventually found Rosalie playing pool with Felix, but she abandoned him and passed her cue to one of the guys to take over. She led me off to her secret stash of cherry vodka, and we made ourselves some Dirty Shirley's.
A Dirty Shirley is a drink we created ourselves. It was similar to a Shirley Temple but with alcohol. It was just cherry vodka, Sprite and a little sour mix, and it tasted just like more tame version if you got the proportions right.
Drinks in hand, we headed back to the party and spent the rest of the night mingling, talking, dancing, and playing pool with everyone. To my surprise, none of the usual skanks caused any trouble that Rose or I could see, and I was relieved to not have drama for once.
Jacob was being really sweet and affectionate, but not too clingy. It reminded me a lot of when we first started hanging out together. At one point, he pulled me into an empty hall and assaulted my mouth and neck with hot kisses. His hands were planted firmly on my hips, roughly rubbing his thumbs against the exposed skin between my pants and shirt. I let my hands explore his broad shoulders, rubbing up and down over his arms. Damn, he had some sexy arms. They were just...grr...fucking hot. I was thoroughly enjoying myself, if I do say so.
His plump lips peppered kisses from the hollow of my neck, up my collarbone, and eventually back up to my lips. “I want you so bad. You are so damn hot tonight, Bella,” he breathed onto my overheating skin.
That's when I froze. Momentarily.
Oh fuck me, I can't fucking fuck Jacob tonight.
I had already been with Edward that day. The alcohol had temporarily clouded the lingering memories of my sleepover, but reality suddenly hit me like lightning.
Shit.
It had been so long since that rule was necessary for me that I had almost forgotten it. Actually, the last time was here at Ben's house when Garrett cornered me in the pantry.
Trying not to freak out too much, I let our hot and heavy make out session continue, but I welcomed the interruption when some other people came down the hall.
“I'm gonna go find Rosalie,” I told him. I gently patted his cheek and left one last quick kiss on his mouth before trotting off in search of my BFF.
My pace was fast, but I attempted to retain some control as I frantically searched for Rosalie. After buzzing through the game room, two bedrooms and three family rooms, I found her in the downstairs kitchen. She was standing by the counter talking to a couple girls who were actually not bitches, and I ran up and grabbed her by the hand.
“I need you,” I pleaded. Without hesitation she came with me to an unoccupied bathroom.
“Bella, what the hell is wrong? Are you okay? You look totally tweaked,” she said, trying to dissect my sudden panic.
“I'm a frigging idiot, that's what's wrong,” I told her. She smirked and gave me the 'what now?' look. “Fuck, fuck, fuck! I already had sex with Edward today and I know Jacob totally expects us to stay together here tonight. What am I supposed to do?”
She contemplated my predicament for a moment, then made her suggestion.
“Pretend to get sick?”
“No, I don't want people to think I can't handle my liquor.”
“Want me to pretend to get sick?”
“That won't work, either. Felix would want to take you home.”
“Yeah, you're probably right.”
We were both silent for another minute, attempting to think of something that would work.
“Are you close to your period?” she asked.
“Yeah, but not until Tuesday. If I fake it this early, I'll have to cover my ass on the back end to explain why it was so long.”
“Crap.”
“Yeah...” I trailed off. Then something hit me. It might just work. “Why don't we go up to one of the guest bedrooms and put on a movie. We can pretend we passed out. We'll go in the one Jacob and I usually sleep in when we're here. Please take one for the team! I know you won't get to have sex tonight, but I'd do it for you!”
“All right, no problem. But you owe me, woman. I'm damn horny tonight,” she said.
“Whatever, you're always horny.”
“True.”
So we did just what we had discussed. For added effect, we put the empty vodka bottle and cups on the night stand, and we left our shoes and socks on the floor. The music from the party downstairs pounded through the house, but we ignored it as we watched our movie and enjoyed some girl talk. To be completely honest, it was really nice to take some down time with Rose and chill. We saw each other all the time, but we had less and less of this kind of time lately.
The guys must have been too drunk to notice that we had gone missing because it took two hours for anyone to come looking for us. We pretended to be asleep when Jacob came in and placed a kiss on my forehead before walking back out of the room.
We really fell asleep after that because I woke to the morning light, not next to Rosalie but Jacob.
“Hey sleepyhead,” he murmured with a sweet smile.
“Morning,” I mumbled back. “What happened?”
Faking my level of inebriation was probably the best way to go.
“You and Rose passed out up here. Felix took her into one of the other bedrooms when he wanted to go to sleep. How much did you guys drink last night? I didn't think you were doing too bad, but...”
“More than I thought, I guess,” I lied. Whatever. He wouldn't know that difference.
“You know,” he began with a mischievous grin. “I'm very disappointed that we didn't get to finish what we started last night.”
With that, he pulled me closer to him and started nuzzling my neck.
Well....today is a new day...
My positive response to his affection was well received, and I was quickly stripped of my shirt and pants, which I had slept in. He kissed eagerly down my torso, never stopping at one area for too long. When he reached my belly button, his tongue circled the sensitive skin around it, and he planted a quick kiss on my little freckle just above it. That freckle was the reason I never got my belly button pierced. It's exactly where a piercing would have gone, but I preferred my beauty mark over an adornment.
As his tongue and mouth inched lower and moved back and forth across my quivering belly, my breathing picked up, and I couldn't help but be filled with excitement. My hips shifted up to meet him, and I felt the rumble of his soft laughter against my pelvis. The sensation only added to my excitement, which in turn encouraged him to peel my little thong off with his teeth.
Soon, but not soon enough, he was buried exactly where I wanted him to be, rocking my body with his unbelievably talented mouth. He was unrelenting, never once using his hands, which made the entire thing that much hotter. The fact that he could bring me to my climax with just his mouth turned me on as much as the act itself.
To my surprise, when he crawled back up my body after my orgasm, he simply laid down beside me and wrapped me in his thick, sculpted arms. I was feeling a little obligated to reciprocate, but he inoffensively pulled my hand away from his boxers and kissed my fingertips.
“I got what I wanted. I think you did, too. Am I wrong?” he whispered.
Still completely confused, I nodded and smiled. I really had no idea why he wouldn’t want anything in return, but who was I to complain? Yah for freebies!
Glancing at my watch, I groaned at the time.
“What's wrong?” Jacob asked.
“I'm supposed to meet my parents for brunch. I'm sorry. Can you drive me home?” I felt awful making him get out of bed, but he didn't seem to mind.
“Not a problem, babe,” he assured me.
“Would you like to come?”
Oh!
Where did that come from?
“I'd love to,” he responded with a smile I'd never seen in all the months we had known each other.
Well crap.
Word vomit.
The origin? I have absofuckinglutely no idea.
I hadn't intended on asking Jacob to come with me to meet my parents, it just kind of came out.
I had given my mom and dad the very abridged version of our relationship, but I never anticipated introducing them to him. All they knew was that Jacob was a friend of Rosalie's boyfriend and that we went on dates occasionally. This was sure to be a damn surprise. For all of us, apparently.
We got dressed and I made the bed while Jake cleaned up the room. We crept out of the house, sure that everyone else who crashed there was still asleep. He drove me back to my apartment, agreeing to go home and get ready himself, then meet me back here in an hour.
As soon as I got inside, I called my mom and told her I would be bringing a friend to brunch with me. She was surprised and as curious as I expected her to be, and I was happy to leave it on her shoulders to tell my dad. I warned them not to be presumptuous and not to give Jacob the boyfriend third degree. He was just my friend who was keeping me company on the drive to meet them. My mom may have asked if he had also kept me company last night, but I pretended like I hadn't heard her and ended our call so I could get ready.
I showered quickly, then paraded around the apartment with nothing but a towel on my head as I tried to figure out what to wear. Normally, I went very causal when going to see my parents. Jeans and a tee shirt, hair in a sloppy ponytail, minimal make up. Today, however, I felt the need to at least put forth a little effort considering that Jacob would be coming along.
I finally settled on a pair of distressed jeans that hugged my curves nicely without showing off too much, pairing a camisole with a comfortable blue Henley. Coupling the ensemble with my favorite brown boots and some simple accessories, my look was almost complete. I checked the time and knew I didn't have enough to straighten my hair, but I wanted to do more than throw it up into a messy bun. Instead, I opted to add a little mousse and scrunched my long locks into simple waves and curls. I blow dried it for a minute to set the look, and I was ready to go.
With perfect timing, I heard a knock at my door while I was switching my purses.
Jacob greeted me with a quick kiss, then we argued over who would drive. Since I had invited him, I insisted on taking my car even though it was a piece of junk compared to his.
We met my parents at a cute little country club that had an amazing brunch buffet on Sundays. I got my usual – a fresh omelet, half a Belgian waffle with berries, and a cup of mixed fruit. And coffee. Always lots of coffee. It was more than I could eat, but buffets are made for overindulging.
My parents were cordial to Jacob, and to my surprise, didn't pry too much or ask too many personal questions. For the most part, they inquired about his work. Mom and Dad filled me in on their week, and I shared a few stories about the kids at the daycare. I was initially feeling quite awkward about the whole thing when we arrived, but by the end I had relaxed significantly.
If Jacob had any apprehension about meeting my folks, I had no clue. He was calm, collected, and quite friendly with them. This surprised me a little bit. I realized that I had never really seen him interact with people outside of bars, parties and our friends. Despite his easy going nature, Jacob wasn't the type of guy who needed to be the center of attention. He wasn't shy by any means, but he also didn't make a production of himself. The way that piece of his personality carried through with my family was sweet and polite.
I liked the way he got along with my parents so well, but it also left me in an endless cyclone of confusion. I had never wanted to introduce them, but my traitor mouth invited him. As nervous as I had been about his presence today, I was actually comfortable and enjoying myself.
This shit's confusing.
What would you do if we woke up and the whole world was gone?
Well, would you believe with me is where you belong?
Well there goes the world and we're right in the middle
There goes the world and we're right in the middle
I said leave me here
I said leave me here with you
Well, would you believe with me is where you belong?
Well there goes the world and we're right in the middle
There goes the world and we're right in the middle
I said leave me here
I said leave me here with you
In The Middle – Theory of a Deadman
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